things have been pretty good for both of them...haha...I am happy...and sad at the same time...lol...happy that she's happy with him...sad that...many times I am left alone becuz of that...but I guess it can't be helped...it's for their future...and I really dun want to do anything that might harm it...although some dark side of me might be tempted to do juz that at times...lol...

yes...I admit...I do want her for myself...becuz I know once she belongs to someone else...that's the end of me..haha...she will stick to him and I have no idea what would be left of me...

and that's precisely y I REALLY gotta move on...lol....I've lost count the number of times ppl telling me that...and myself saying the same thing over and over again....

and just ytd...I did something stupid again...something that I did for her..but she was not happy with it. she was feeling tired and I wanted her to take a bus tgt with him that requires less walking back to her hostel while I board another bus alone back to sch...kill 2 birds with one stone right? WRONG...she felt it wasn't natural and doesn't want me to do it again...lol...me and my stupid self right...can't even take care of myself...still want to take care of ppl....

I am hopeless le...lol...

a few days back....she needed to buy polaroid film...cheap ones...she asked me for help....and I went on to call the places where my friend recommended that could get at a cheaper rate...after that...I went to the place to buy it...telling her it was on the way when it was super out of the way....lol...

Y am I still doing all this shit when I get nothing in return..when it is not appreciated at all...not wanted...and not needed...lol...whatever that I do...or dun do...she doesn't care at all...doesn't give a shit...lol...

but I know I will continue to do it...till I move on....

I am living for her happiness....for now...lol...

such.a.cock.